Unemployment and Time Management

How to Regain the Importance of Your Day!

If you've been following me on Facebook you know that in October of 2009 I got caught in a reduction of force (RIF) at my company and was laid off. (After 11-1/2 years of exemplary service, but hey, I'm not bitter.) It's now July 2011 and I'm still searching for a job. But this blog post isn't about the job search process per se; rather, it's about the impact being unemployed has had on my time management. I thought that in today's economy I might not be the only one in this boat and so wanted to share some thoughts and tips with you. I hope you will get something out of this and please share your thoughts with me.

You would think that being unemployed would be boon to my personal time management practice. I mean after all, I now have all this spare time, right? I have all the time in the world to sit down and plan and track everything. Those excuses of too many phone calls and emails, of not having enough time, are gone.

But you would be wrong... wrong on so many levels.

First off, let's look at this thing called "free time". I've discovered that being unemployed is apparently a lot like being retired. As soon as people find out you "aren't busy" you become inundated with requests on your time - some of it very well meaning. And you take them up on it too. You get yourself involved because you want to be busy; you don't want to sit at home alone and wallow - you want to get out there and at least act like you're productive. Before you know it, you find that every spare minute is consumed.

But these things really feel more like busy work. It's not your "job" because you arent' getting paid for it. It doesn't feel important and you don't bother tracking it. Besides, tracking it often just becomes a reminder that you aren't working anymore.

The time that you do track is a single task: LOOK FOR WORK. You could track each and every job you apply for (and I actually do recommend that you track these in some manner) but if you're like me, you're sending out so many resumes in a day that it becomes counter productive to track them all.

The other problem is emotional. Being unemployed for any length of time wears you down; it eats away at your self esteem. I find this especially true as someone who is middle-age with a career that has been in middle to high management - those jobs just are too few and far between right now and the competition is fierce. It really takes its toll. When this happens you get depressed. You start to lose hope and sitting in front of the TV seems so much more inviting - and who wants to track TV time on their task list!?!

So your time management practice slips. It slipped for me, and I bet it has slipped for you. This is no time to beat yourself up for this; it's natural and it happens. Don't worry about it.

I've discovered (with the help of some great friends) a few things that can help.

The daily routine is broken - it's gone, and you won't get that back until you start that new job. It's time to create a new "day at the office routine" that will give you a sense of doing something. When you were at the office the day was filled with phone calls, meetings, coffee breaks, projects, tasks, and even lunches, parties and meeting with the team for drinks after work.

I realized it was important for me to take the very things I was doing throughout the day and give them the same "work" importance. From the important things (like job research and searches, Dr's visits, and charitable work) to the mundane (like doing the laundry, cleaning the kitchen or bathroom, and shopping) to the fun (like dinner with friends, meeting someone for lunch, or working on my web site), I began to log these things as if they were parts of my "business" day.

I decided not to track these in my task list or calendar - I continue to use those at a higher level - but rather, I use a simple spreadsheet. I plug in the things I know are coming up and each day I block out the time as things come up. It's best to plot them in ahead of time rather than retroactively, but the most important thing is to get them posted.

At the end of the day it looks like an actual work day, with meetings, projects, lunches, etc. My day feels productive and I'm less prone to drift off and waste time.

Creating a Sacred Workspace

Create Sacred Space? Really? Where I'm working, where I spread out my papers, answer the phone and set up my computer is really a sacred space?

Well, yes. At least it should be; especially in terms of "sacred" meaning something that is set apart.

If you're someone that works in an office building with other co-workers--your basic, typical office environment, this is pretty much established for you, though it may seem anything but sacred. But if you're like me and work from home then your office space is not so clearly deliniated; and if your home office is in a small apartment--like mine-- then the office also serves as dining room, living room, gaming center, media center, etc. What happens to me is that I get horribly distracted. This has four basic results:

1. I start focusing on other, less important things, or
2. I start multi-multi-tasking and my energy is so dispersed that I get nothing done, or
3. I pulled into something mind-numbing and unproductive like surfing the web or playing a game and the next thing I know the day has gone, or
4. I get so frustrated that I just walk away watch TV or something.

Clearly, those are not productive!

So what can you do about it? Well, if you're lucky enough to have some mobility in your office equipment (laptop, cell phone, iPad, etc) then go someplace else! Change the scenary for a while. Maybe find another room. If the weather is nice, go sit on your front porch or go to the park (and if those places happen to have wifi, all the better!) Head to the library and work there for a bit.

If you're not that mobile, (for example, while I have mobile equipment, the majority of my resources on on the desktop computer at home and that limits my ability to work away from the desk) then you have to find some ways to "sanctify" the space you have in order to refocus.

Since I'm physically limited in where I can go, I have found a few simple and oddly ritualistic things that help. Now, don't be afraid of ritual! We are, actually, ritual beings. Rituals are a symbolic language that speaks to us on very deep, subconscious levels and can communicate things to our psyche that all the trainings and readings and seminars just won't ever reach.

First, unclutter what's right in front of you. For me, that is NOT easy... just ask Jordan. I am a clutter person; I believe God made flat surfaces to stack stuff on. I have no delusions that I will change this behavior (sorry, Jordan) but to help me focus I can grab the loose papers and various wires, books and light bulbs that are sitting within a 45 degree viewing area in front of me and I can move them someplace else. Outta sight, outta mind!

Second, the stuff that you can't move, or might need handy, neaten up. Restack them; line them up. Put all the pens in the holder and put it in a neat place; line things up in right angles (you don't have to be OCD, but it helps!) and move them outward towards the edges of that 45 degree area in front of you, trying your best to keep the area right in front of you clear, with the exception of your keyboard or perhaps a pad of paper that you're using.

Third, find something that will engage your senses to "sanctify" the space. When I sit down, I now light a little stick of incense that I have off to the side. This signals my brain, through my sense of smell, that what is happening now is special and deserves my attention. Don't have, or don't like, incense? No problem. Use an icon, statue, crystal, rock, or piece of potter--anything that visually establishes that the space is now set apart and special.

Using cues from your senses--touch, smell, sight, even taste (coffee does it for me!)--you can communicate to yourself that the space you are using is now set aside for something special, and that special thing is work. When you're done, get up, move the "sacred object" and put it away and let the space return to it's other uses.

Depression, Anxiety and Time Management

For everyone, depression and anxiety are part of the natural ebb and flow of our emotional make up. Everyone feels depressed at some point in their life. It is a natural part of the grieving process; a response to some significant loss.

We also experience anxiety at the prospect of some impending "doom" (whether it be a test we're not prepared for or that meeting with the boss that was called unexpectedly.) Anxiety is our "early warning system" that primes our defenses and readies our fight-or-flight reflexes.

For the majority of people these emotional responses are usually relatively short lived and have a minimal impact on our ability to function. But for many these emotions can darken the world into an ever spiraling vortex that is debilitating and paralyzing. Some take medications to level the playing field and minimize the damage; others hunker down and wait it out; still others seek out various coping mechanisms - some good, some not so good - to help weather the storm.

Regardless of where you fit in this spectrum, it is important to know that depression and anxiety will have an ill effect on our daily routines in time management. Our emotions play a vital part in both our desire and ability to be focused, proactive, and consistent. When we are depressed or anxious our tendency is to avoid the things that we feel are fueling those emotions, whether or not they actually are. All those things on our to-do list look like big red buttons hot-wired directly into our depression and anxiety and the last thing we want to do is face them and deal with them. They don't just loom large on our horizon, they are gigantic! They are the monsters hiding in our closets; they are the stuff of our nightmares - literally.

The result? We avoid doing our time management. It's amazing all the things that can creep up to crowd out even the possibility of sitting down to do it. I, myself, am partial to the "crawl back in bed and pull the covers over my head" response. And what do we do when we avoid doing the work? We beat ourselves up and tell ourselves how really bad we are. And that leads into more spiraling downwards, more anxiety, more depression... and more avoidance... and... and... and...

I know from experience that the reality of those to-do items is never as dire as we feel. On more than one occasion, I've bitten the bullet and faced my fears head on and discovered that it really wasn't so bad after all. It didn't dissipate the depression or solve the anxiety, but I was able to at least stop beating myself up for a little while. But for those who suffer from extremer bouts of depression and anxiety, it is often the rare occasion that they can muster up the ability to forge ahead and get down to work.

I will tell you right now that we are all victims to our emotions. Even those who only suffer mild, or "normal," depression and anxiety are victims of these emotional quagmires -- they just may not be as long lasting or as debilitating. But even if you suffer from chronic depression or have an anxiety disorder, either taking or not taking medication, your reactions to them are perfectly normal.

These emotional mine fields derail us, regardless of the severity of them. They throw us off the track of our daily planning and review, as well as our ability to monitor our activities throughout the day. While our instinct, as well as our fears, keep us focused on our being derailed, that is really not the right place to focus—especially during the time of derailment.

Instead the better focus is on what we need to do to get us back on track. The first thing may be to do absolutely nothing. During the throws of the depression or anxiety it may be impossible to do anything we might consider “productive”. Usually that just makes us feel worse, so let me give you permission to just do absolutely nothing. You have enough to worry about, so why add this to your plate? As the saying goes, “this too shall pass.” So you can wait this out and pick back up when the storm is over.

The next thing to do is to be gentle with yourself. Don’t beat yourself up or put yourself down. Be forgiving. Also, don’t try to analyze the situation right now. Once you’re back on track and some time has gone by, then it will be time to review and see what happened and what got you back on track.

And finally, realize that the things you are worrying about probably aren’t as big as you think. All those action items on your to-do list will take far less time than your fears are telling you; the severity level of them is probably much lower than you think; they will still be there—without much damage done—when things settle down.

Once the depression or anxiety has subsided, gently return to your practice. At first it will feel overwhelming, so take it smaller bites. Start fresh – don’t grab your now stale to-do list and try to pick up where you left off. Grab a fresh sheet of paper, a new page in your planner, whatever you’re using and start anew. Then, focus on the prioritization aspect. Don’t worry about the doing of the tasks, just the prioritizing of them. This is when limiting your “A’s” to just 3 is really important. You will want to make up for lost time – that’s natural. Fight this urge and force yourself to limit you “A” priorities to only 3. Focus on these for now and leave the rest.

Next, look for those things that can be scheduled forward, or better yet, completely cancelled. Getting them off your plate now will free you up considerably.

After a few weeks, when things have returned to something you consider normal, and you sit down to do your weekly review, look back over the events and analyze it. But don’t look for what went wrong. Instead, look at the things that got you back on track. Focus on the positive actions you took. These are the tools you will want to file away in your “tool box” for later retrieval.

The most important thing to remember is to not beat yourself up—realize that you are human and that what you’re going through is 100% natural. You’re not alone and you’re not the first person to have this problem. Focus on self care and then work on gently (and this is really the key word) returning to the practice.

Is "Task" a Four-Letter Word?

For many of us, the word "task" is a four-letter word... a dirty word that makes us cringe deep inside and makes us want to run screaming back to bed, pull the covers up over our head, and try to forget it all.

Well, if that's you, then I won't try to redeem the word for you - it's not really important to do. What IS important is that you focus on what ... um... "tasks" mean and get them done.

A quick look at the thesaurus gives us a plethora of replacement words that you can easily substitute for that dirty, four-letter word. You just might find one these words to be a suitable replacement, and if so, I encourage you to replace away! The goal here is to achieve what we can do with the tool, not what we name it.

So, here are some options:

Action, Allocation, Assignment, Charge, Choice, Commission, Could Do, Designation, Duty, Effort, Engagement, Enterprise, Errand, Exercise, Function, Function, Get Done, Goal, Like To Do, Responsibility, Selection, To Do, Undertaking, Want To Do

So find the word or phrase that works for you. Don't be afraid to try on different words until you find what motivates you!

Out of the Dust

This is the beginning of Lent. It is one of those times of year, like New Years and, for some, Advent - perhaps the odd birthday or two as well - when we try our best to set a goal and stick to it.

In Lent we traditionally give something up - something that is both dear to us and something we feel we can live without, such as chocolate, or coffee, or meat. A more recent development in the Lenten tradition is to take on something new as a spiritual exercise such as setting aside a specific time to read or meditate, or to do some specific charitable act.

Whatever your spiritual background, be it Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, Jainism... whatever it may be, I'm sure you've found yourself at this very common cross-road of setting some task for yourself such as letting go of something or taking on something. You said to yourself, "This is good. I can do this."

But what happens a week or so into the practice? Well, if you're like me, you find that you skipped one... then two... then... well, the practice sorta fell by the wayside and that chocolate bar just magically was in your hand and all was gone, save the wrapper!

The same holds true of our time management practices. We start our really well those first few days, doing our morning planning, our evening review, keeping up with our continuous monitoring. Then that morning the alarm went off late, or our best friend came into town and we left work a little early and hung out with them until the wee hours - no planning or review that day. Then it was a quick slide down that slippery slope.

How do I know this, you ask? Easy! It happens to me! Yep. I'm just like you. It happens; we start out, we slip. So what do we do?

I went to a quiet day retreat this weekend and the Rev'd Barbara Crafton was the speaker and this very topic was part of her focus. I relearned some very interesting points I'd like to share with you.

1) Little by little our disciplines trickle into dust. We tend to really beat ourselves up over this, but it is very much the nature of things. There are certainly things that can help us stay on track, but chances are you start out gang-busters, and then little by little that discipline just fades away.

I want to tell you something about this... IT'S OK! It happens. So what do you do? Easy. You pick it up and start it again... no harm, no foul.

2) Failing at something doesn't mean you are a failure. Just because you failed at doing your planning doesn't mean you are a failure - or that you are a failure at time management itself. Failing at something isn't a bad thing; quite the contrary, it's an opportunity to learn.

Sit back and think about why you may have failed. Maybe you're trying to force it at a time that's not right for you (if you're not a "morning person" then setting that alarm clock a half hour earlier just probably was recipe for disaster anyway.)

This practice - the practice of good time management - is a gift, not a job. Let yourself enjoy it; do it at a time that is good for you. If you do that, then you will begin to see more and more how your life is continuing to grow toward betterment.

Keep Up The Good Work

It has been my experience that day three is about the time we start to slip a little... we wake up a little late, there was no hot water in the building, the gym was crowded and took extra time, the boss had put a note on our desk that we had to respond to 1st thing... Lot's of little things have a habit of conspiring against us to convince us that, well, just for today we can skip that morning planning, or that tonight we can do that meeting or class and not do the evening review.

I'm here to tell ya folks, that's a slippery slope (and yes, that's the voice of experience talking!)

Make the time to do it. Remember, you're building a habit and consistency is key. Renew your efforts; carve out the time (even if it's to sneak of to the bathroom for 10 minutes to do you planning or review there!) These early weeks are vital.

Keep up the good work, my friends! And let me know if you have any questions or need help.